Legs?

Legs are often forgotten in terms of the big picture. Rarely given the respect they rightly deserve. They are just left, hanging, useless. Yet! where would we be without them, probably bumming around.
Spike Milligan the celebrated author, comedian and inventor of the Goons, was the first to draw attention to the dilemma suffered by these appendages and I do mean draw.
In 'Puckoon' his iconic book about rural Ireland in the sixties, 'Milligan' the main character calls on the author to look again at the legs he wrote for him, scrawny, spindly, not up to the job. He then calls on the author to write him a better pair of legs.

There's another point, legs come in pairs, not the Rocha or the Conference type, no! the type that accompany each other everywhere. They need to be independent, able to depend on each other, to move in sequence. The type that can be called upon to dance, run, hop and support, no matter what one or the other is called on to accomplish.
It’s not always about legs sometimes about food as we are told in the cartoon 'PEARLS BEFORE SWINE' where the main character claims the cartoonist can't draw food with follow on consequences. I may return to the issue of food in the future but beware of the power of the writer/painter.

The book. 'Puckoon' doesn't tell us whether the author paid any attention to Milligan’s demand, but I know where he's coming from.
Badly drawn legs can be cumbersome, unwieldy, uncontrollable particularly if you are a character in a book (Who knows, we may all be).
If the author doesn't pay due attention to the legs of his/her characters, they can be placed in situations where there is onerous demands on their ability, a mis-match.
How can scrawny legs climb a mountain, break a four minute mile, even chase a bus, legs need to be suitable and remember authors can adapt, but legs can't.
If the scrawny legs are drawn by L.S. Lowry the celebrated painter, then it is different, scrawny legs fit in. Matchstick men and matchstick cats and dogs, scrawny legs suitable.
Just think of cats and dogs and how they depend on the write (Right) legs, more than humans.
If a dog needs to use a lamppost how can he cock one if it won’t support his body. Without the support of his leg he couldn't use the lamppost with his bum on the ground, how cruel to dogs.
Cats need to climb walls, and open doors (They can) move fast, they depend very much on the right legs. Just think of a cat bumming along, unthinkable.
Of course, as a male, I can't dismiss female pegs (Legs) and how important they are for my enjoyment of the outdoor environment.
Good female legs go all the way to heaven with much promise of happiness and joy. This type of leg is usually at its best during the summer when the sun is shining. They have an inherent beauty that can only be fully appreciated by the male of the species. Unlike the legs on a racehorse, they can soothe the eyes of the most stressed male and need to be given special attention when being written or drawn.
Legs are important, no essential, for the functioning of mankind, not to mention cat and dog kind.

J.C. Dublin-A City defined by its legs.

Who sweeps the confessional?

It should be a major consideration for Catholics or for that matter, anyone who confesses, no matter what religion, as to what happens to their sins after they are confessed.
One could foolishly presume that once confessed, that's it. Is it really? (See my piece on thoughts further down in this blog-'Thoughts of a blank mind' 14/11/2011)

Where do sins go, like, who cleans them up after confession? Some sins are heavy and i know they are cleaned up as there is never any on the ground after confession, I know, I've looked. Has Dyson devised a special unit, vacuum for sins and can it cope with mortalers as well as denials, equally? Is there a cleaner who goes in and looks at what we do, possibly knowing we don't confess all?

Could it be a neighbour who knows us better than we do, could be?

There has to be a lot of work in it, particularly around communion time when possibly up to a hundred children in one school can drop their mind-boggling sins.
I accept these sins can be small but there is still a lot.

How big are 100 small sins, presuming they all drop only one, add that to possibly half the parents with slightly bigger ones and the odd major one, see what I mean?
I personally stay away because I don't like stepping on other peoples sins, though i wouldn't mind a quick read, curiosity, is that a sin?

If I slip on sins, can I claim on someone's insurance, is there slippery sin insurance, sin-gular cover. If not, why not.

Is this type of accident covered under health and safety legislation, if so, who do you report them to?

Personally, I would like to see a sin box, where you write your sins down and place them in the box. It can then print out your penance appropriate to the sin.
To be clear, the reason I want to see one of these boxes is there is a chance I could read them, should they have phone numbers and names, that could be fun. (To be honest, i'd like to see sins go viral)

Could our local council charge for the disposal of these through a sin tax, worth looking at. The tax would have to relate to the size and gravity of the 'Sin'. would politicians be exempt or would their sins be hard to quantify?

It would be fair to presume in this post-'Celtic tiger' era, that a lot of sins are starting to surface and we need something new to save the Irish economy, and by attachment, the German, French and Dutch economies as well. I wouldn't like to be responsible for forcing France into taxing its citizens into becoming Russian citizens, though I've nothing against those nice Russian people. Particularly as they read my blogs.

It's an important question, as sins can be very sensitive issues. Imagine if you confessed to murder on the basis of confidentially and someone found it stuck in a corner of the confession box, you could be in trouble. Could the murder squad from the local Garda station raid the confession box just after you leave?

Authors thought;-is this where the red-tops get some of their news, scandals.
Aside/Joke; Are sandals the shoes of scandals?
Second authors thought-Can we trust the people who clean up the sins. Do they take a quick peek?

Back to seriousness, if we can worry about tapping mobiles why shouldn't we worry about stray or stolen sins. 

Let's be honest here if sins can condone sinners straying what's to say they won't stray themselves. Errant sins need to be recognised and corraled, controlled. This could be the next big challenge faced by the human race, but please, no legislation as this only empowers sinners and crooks more. Particularly legal sinners.

Sins have ignored all effort to control them, science has failed to find a solution to this evil. Sins have been around longer than heart disease (Adam the first sinner or was it one of the fish. Could fish eat apples in those days?) and yet science is making better progress with heart disease than with sins, in fact, they are so successful that, given time, we won't be able to die, surely this leads to a question, why and will sins become stronger?
As we live longer will we be able to commit better and bigger sins?

Could HELL be used as a giant recycling plant for disposing of sins?
Just a thought from me, any comments?

PS; I suppose the same questions or some of them could be asked about where all the deleted e-mail are stored or what happens to them?

PS 2, Some churces now do away with confession boxes and you confess in the open. does this mean you take your sins with you or place them in a doggie (sin) bag?






J.C-Dublin-A City defined by it's saintleness?

THE STORYTELLER

Man in black

Five feet high and rising

Strummed his guitar

To forty shades of green

He plucked and sang

In prison

San Quentin

Stood and cheered

His Father

Called him Sue

As he built his Chevrolet

One piece at a time

He rode

The Orange Blossom Special

Walked the line

Fell into a Ring of Fire

Challenged the devil       

To a duel with guitars

Blew away

The Folsom Prison Blues

A storyteller

Singing his songs

With a choir

Ghost riders in the sky

JC-Dublin-A City defined by it's songs.